chelle

Smallville

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Acts Of Faith

chelle

Title: Acts Of Faith

Author: chelle

Author's email: chelle@chelle.slashcity.org

Author's URL: http://chelle.slashcity.org/

Fandom: Smallville

Category: Slash

Pairing: Clark/Lex

Archive: Ask first

Rating: NC-17

Disclaimer: Not mine, and they never will be. Damn.

Spoilers: 2.15 "Prodigal," 2.16 "Fever," and 2.17 "Rosetta."

Summary: Clark and Lex learn about faith.

He'd had sex with Clark Kent.

Lex turned the thought over in his mind. Clark. Him. Sex.

It still didn't make any sense. Or maybe it made too much sense. Or the wrong kind of sense. It was far too early in the morning for him to be sorting out such particularities. He re-read the note Clark had left on the nightstand, the corner tucked beneath Lex's alarm clock.

Lex,

Had to go home and help with the chores. You looked so peaceful I didn't want to wake you. I'll call later.

Clark.

No explanations there. Returning the note to the nightstand, Lex slid from the bed. The shower was warm and he simply stood under it, not washing, not really wanting to remove the traces of Clark from his skin. Tipping his head to the side, Lex let the water beat down on the place where his shoulder and neck met. It was habit, an attempt to ease the omnipresent tension. He repeated the action on the other side, ignoring the fact that he was less tense than usual.

He knocked over Helen's shampoo when he reached for the soap. She'd been living at the mansion for two weeks, but he still wasn't accustomed to the presence of her things. She'd left for Boston the day before, a visit with friends to be followed by a medical conference. The paper she was delivering was the result of a year's research and Lex had been considering flying out just for that session. He dropped his chin to his chest. This wouldn't have happened if she hadn't been gone.

He'd invited Clark to the mansion, wanting to just spend time with his friend, maybe shoot some pool, watch a movie. They hadn't had much time together lately, even before Helen. Clark had wanted pizza, and Lex had agreed on the condition that they watch the Next Gen marathon that seemed to be playing pretty much all of the time on one of the cable channels. Lex was of the opinion that Clark hadn't watched nearly enough Star Trek. They were showing the episode with the battle at Wolf 3.5.9. It was one of Lex's favorites. Q and Ryker were arguing, and Lex was fairly certain that he hadn't been reciting the dialogue, but when he'd glanced at Clark, Clark had been grinning.

"What?"

"You're such a geek."

"The geeks shall inherit."

"I thought you wanted to rule."

Lex grinned. "That too."

And that's when it had happened, when Clark Kent had leaned forward and kissed him.

Lex turned off the water and stepped from the shower. He should've stopped it right then, should've pushed Clark gently, but firmly, away. He hadn't. Instead, he'd pulled Clark closer. Kissing had led inevitably to touching. Touching required nakedness, and the bedroom was a more appropriate place for nakedness than the study.

Which is how Lex had found himself naked in his bed, in his and Helen's bed, with Clark.

Lex hung up his towel, ignoring the erection the memories sparked, and went back into his bedroom to dress. His clothes from the night before were still on the floor and he tossed them into the hamper before dropping onto the edge of the bed.

He had cheated on Helen. Two whole weeks of living together and he'd cheated on her, with a sixteen year old. His best friend. Clark.

Lying down, Lex closed his eyes. Clark's hands were large and warm and Lex never wanted to forget the way they had felt. Or the way Clark had looked, wide-eyed and gasping with pleasure as Lex caressed him.

His hand was curled around his cock and Lex couldn't stop himself from stroking. He came picturing Clark's face and remembering Clark's touch.

***

It was Saturday, but Lex spent the day in his office trying to work. Helen called and they had a pleasant, albeit brief, conversation. Lex was certain there hadn't been a trace of guilt in his voice. Luthors didn't feel guilt.

Clark turned up in the middle of the afternoon. He actually lingered in the doorway to Lex's office, as though he was uncertain of his welcome. Maybe he was.

Lex smiled, trying to make it clear that whatever had happened between them, Clark was still welcome in his home. "Clark, come in."

"Hi." Clark carefully shut the door behind him. "I thought we should talk."

"Probably a good idea," Lex agreed, rising and going to the bar. "Would you like something to drink?"

Clark shook his head.

"I have root beer." In actuality, he had Clark's favorite brand of root beer.

"Okay."

Lex resisted the urge to pour himself a drink and grabbed a bottle of water instead. Clark was still standing just inside the door. Lex went to him and handed him the root beer. "Why don't we sit?"

Clark followed him to the couch and sat leaning forward, with his elbows on his thighs, staring at the bottle in his hands.

Lex leaned against the back of the couch, painfully aware of both the careful six inches between them and the silence. He wasn't trying to force Clark to be the first to speak. He just couldn't think of anything to say, or rather he could think of too many things to say, none of them the right thing.

"I have terrible timing, don't I?" Clark asked without turning to look at him.

"You might say that." Lex took a drink of his water and turned Clark's words over in his mind. "Does this mean…" He stopped and tried again. "Have you wanted this for a while?"

"Yeah."

"How long?"

"I don't know. It kinda snuck up on me." Clark still wasn't looking at him. "It's why I told Lana and Chloe that I just wanted to be friends."

"Clark."

Clark lifted his head and looked over his shoulder at Lex, hope mixed with sadness on his face.

"Why didn't you say something?"

"It's complicated. You're complicated. Sometimes I want to kiss you until you forget about everything but me. And sometimes I want to grab you and shake you until—"

"Until?"

"Until you stop doing so many stupid things."

Lex couldn't argue with that. Maybe he'd make fewer mistakes if Clark shook him for a while.

"And sometimes I…" Clark faltered.

"Sometimes what?"

"Sometimes I just want to hold you." Clark wasn't looking at him again, and his voice was barely audible.

"Sometimes I want that, too." In truth, it was something Lex had never considered, but he wanted it now, was certain he'd never stop wanting it. Reaching out, he rested a hand on Clark's forearm. It was warm and solid. "Last night was incredible."

"I wasn't sure…" Clark flushed. "I mean it's not like I've had a lot of practice."

"Experience is overrated. You're a generous and caring lover and that beats experience every time."

"But you're still going to tell me we can't do it again." The words were said quietly, but the hurt in Clark's voice was palpable.

Lex started to withdraw his hand, but changed his mind and squeezed Clark's arm lightly instead. "You were right about the timing."

"You think I'm too young."

"You are young." Lex slid his hand down Clark's arm to his wrist, and Clark let go of his root beer, holding it with one hand and linking his free hand with Lex's. "And there are other people to consider. Your parents…"

"Helen."

"Yes."

"You care about her."

"I do, and I just asked her to take a chance on me, to try and build something with me. I can't just—"

"You keep your promises. I understand that, Lex."

"I try to."

"We can still be friends, right?"

"Always." Lex squeezed the hand in his. "The best of friends."

***

Lex didn't see Clark again until the following morning, when he nearly hit Clark with his car. Lex drove him home and, fool that he was, asked questions. He knew he shouldn't ask, that if he didn't ask, then Clark wouldn't evade and lie. But he did, and Clark did, and it left them both feeling lousy; a situation that only worsened when Lex found Clark passed out in the caves that afternoon.

Now it was evening and Lex was pacing around his office, trying to make sense of what he'd seen.

Fact: Clark knew more than he was telling about the caves. Fact: Clark didn't want to share that information with Lex.

Fact: Lionel was interested in the caves and Clark. Fact: Clark didn't trust him.

And that hurt more than Lex was willing to admit. He could still hear Clark's words from that afternoon in the barn, "I only tell people who don't go around stabbing me in the back and lying to me." Not that it was fair to be angry with Clark for something he'd said while under the influence. Lex still didn't know what Clark had been under the influence of, but he knew the signs when he saw them.

But that didn't excuse all of the other times Clark had lied. Lex didn't understand it, how Clark could say they were friends and in the next breath make it clear that Lex wasn't good enough to confide in.

Rejection. Closing his eyes, Lex leaned against his desk. He'd been telling himself that he pushed Clark out of curiosity, that he was a scientist and Clark was a mystery. More recently, he'd told himself that he had to protect Clark from Lionel, and that it would be easier to protect him if he knew what Clark was hiding. But the truth was simpler than that, and uglier. Clark didn't think Lex worthy of his trust and Lex felt rejected.

Of course, Lex had gotten even. He'd rejected Clark in turn, and suddenly his motives for that were a whole lot murkier.

Lex took a long drink of his scotch and forced himself to think this through.

Fact: Clark didn't trust him. Fact: Clark desired him and had acted on that desire. Fact: Admitting desire, especially to a friend, was an act of faith, of trust. Therefore, Clark trusted him. Q.E.D.

Lex resumed pacing. Maybe Clark did trust him. Maybe Clark just couldn't trust him with this one secret. Maybe it was dangerous and Clark wanted to protect him. Maybe it wasn't Clark's secret to tell.

Maybe Lex should stop pushing. Maybe Clark not trusting Lex with his secret wasn't about Lex at all, maybe it was about Clark.

Lex was still standing in the middle of his office, sipping his scotch and mulling over that possibility when Clark appeared in the doorway. Lex hid his surprise. "Clark, how are you feeling?"

"I'm okay. I just wanted to apologize for running out on you at the Talon earlier."

Lex smiled his warmest, most welcoming smile, and hoped it looked sincere. "Don't worry about it. How is your mother doing?"

Clark visibly relaxed, clearly pleased that Lex wasn't asking about him. "She tires pretty easily, but the doctor says that's normal. It's weird, thinking about her having a baby."

"I can imagine." Lex carried his empty glass to the bar and refilled it. "Root beer?"

"Sure." Clark leaned against the other side of the bar, accepting the bottle Lex held out to him.

Lex took a deep breath. "I'm glad you came by. There's something I need to say to you."

The familiar closed expression descended over Clark's features.

Lex held up a hand. "Don't. Just listen. Please." He captured Clark's eyes with his and refused to look away until Clark nodded his agreement. Lex took another deep breath. "We both know you have secrets, things you can't or won't share with me." Lex paused, gratified when Clark nodded slightly in acknowledgment. "I ask questions, and you obfuscate, and it doesn't do either of us or our friendship any good." Lex put down his drink and rested both hands on the bar. "What I propose is this: When I ask about things you can't tell me, just say so, flat out. Don't lie, just say 'I can't tell you about that' and I promise I'll accept that answer. This way you don't have to lie, and I don't have to pretend that neither my eyes nor my brain work."

"You are a resident of Smallville now, Lex."

Lex grinned at the joke and held out his hand. "Deal?"

Clark put down his root beer and took Lex's hand, his smile as broad as Lex had ever seen it. "Deal."

"Great. Want to shoot some pool?"

***

Lining up his shot, Lex tapped the cue ball gently, sending it into the eight ball and both of them into the corner pocket for victory number three.

"You hustled your way through college, didn't you?" Clark asked.

Standing, Lex grinned. "I like to gamble, and, unlike my younger brother, I don't cheat."

"Lucas cheats. Now that's a surprise."

"Didn't I tell you what was happening when I found him?"

Clark shook his head.

"He'd been caught cheating at poker, high stakes poker. The loser was not amused. His men were chasing Lucas. I pulled up, got out of the car, held out my hand to him and said, 'Lucas, I'm your brother.'"

Clark burst out laughing. "You didn't."

"Come on, Clark. That was a once in a lifetime line. Of course I said it."

"You are such a geek."

Silence descended, awkward and abrupt.

Clark slid his cue into the rack on the wall. "I should go."

Lex laid his cue on the table and moved closer, stopping a couple of inches in front of Clark. "You don't have to."

"If I stay I'll kiss you again."

"Stay."

Clark's lips were on his as soon as he finished speaking. Lex leaned into him, knowing he shouldn't be doing this. He was abusing Clark's friendship and Helen's trust. He had wanted to be better than this.

But Clark kissed him like he meant it and held him like Lex was the most precious thing in the world. Lex couldn't turn away from that. No matter what his conscience said.

***

As soon as the bedroom door closed behind them, Lex began tugging Clark's shirt free of his jeans. Clark groaned when Lex's hands moved up his sides. Lex brushed Clark's nipples with his fingers, wanting to hear that sound again. Giving pleasure had never felt as good with anyone else as it did with Clark, and Lex had to give, needed to.

He pushed Clark's shirt up and off, and Clark immediately did the same to Lex's long-sleeved t-shirt. Then Clark pulled him close and Lex hissed in a breath at the feel of Clark's skin against his own. Pressing his lips to Clark's neck, Lex began kissing his way upward. He didn't linger and his lips were on Clark's in moments. The kiss was deep and hungry and Lex tightened his hold on Clark, trying to pull him closer, even though it wasn't physically possible.

"God, Lex." Clark buried his face in Lex's neck and Lex could feel how vulnerable he was; faint tremors were passing through him and his breath was uneven.

"It's okay. I've got you," Lex whispered, before catching Clark's earlobe between his teeth. That earned him a groan, and Lex sucked gently, liking the feeling of having an aroused and vulnerable Clark in his arms.

Clark turned his head, capturing Lex's mouth and initiating a series of wet, seeking kisses that left them both panting.

Lex dropped his forehead to Clark's shoulder and inhaled deeply, trying to regain some of his equilibrium.

"Lex." Clark's voice was pure want.

Reaching between them, Lex pulled open the button on Clark's jeans and began to lower the zipper.

"Lex."

"Clark, just…just keep saying my name like that."

Lex pushed his hand into Clark's opened jeans and cupped his erection through his briefs.

"Lex."

Dropping to his knees, Lex tugged at Clark's jeans. Clark's eyes widened, but he helped Lex to push them down. Resting his hands on Lex's shoulders, Clark obligingly stepped out of his jeans. Lex ran his hands up Clark's legs, enjoying the contrast between rough hair and smooth skin. Clark was still wearing his briefs, and Lex pressed his cheek against Clark's erection and inhaled. Even here, Clark smelled like Clark, warm and comforting and safe.

"Lex."

Lex turned his head, brushing his lips against the cotton covering Clark's cock. He smiled at Clark's sharply indrawn breath and hooked his fingers in the waistband of Clark's briefs, lowering them just enough to expose the head. He licked it quickly, and Clark pulled his hands from Lex's shoulders.

"Lex."

Slowly lowering Clark's briefs, Lex licked each bit of skin as he exposed it. When Clark's cock was completely uncovered, he shoved the last of Clark's clothing to the floor and returned his attention to Clark's erection. Wrapping his hand around it, he began to slowly stroke.

"Lex."

Holding Clark's cock firmly at the base, Lex kissed the head, and then lightly licked it again and again, enjoying the taste of Clark's skin. Drawing the head into his mouth, he sucked gently, gradually increasing the suction while rubbing the underside with his tongue. Closing his eyes, Lex slowly slid his mouth down Clark's cock. When it bumped the back of his throat, he slid back up.

"Lex."

He had to look, had to see Clark's face. Clark's eyes were closed and his mouth was open. His face shown with pleasure, and knowing he was the source of that pleasure intensified Lex's own arousal. "Clark, open your eyes."

Clark obeyed and Lex locked his gaze on Clark's before leaning forward and once again taking Clark into his mouth.

"Lex."

Lex groaned. Another man's cock in his mouth wasn't supposed to feel like this, like it belonged there, but this was Clark. If there was one thing he understood about Clark it was that wherever Clark was Lex belonged. Taking hold of Clarks' hips, Lex began to move them back and forth, creating an easy, shared rhythm.

When Clark's hands cupped his head, Lex dropped his own hands to his sides. Everything stopped. They stared at one another; Lex on his knees, naked from the waist up, hands at his sides, with Clark's cock partway into his mouth; and Clark naked, his hands cradling Lex's bare scalp, standing perfectly still and panting with arousal.

Eyes glued to Clark's face, Lex sucked lightly on the flesh in his mouth.

"Lex." Clark's voice was pleading, almost pained.

Lex sucked again, slightly harder this time, and Clark moved his hips slowly forward. At the same time the hands on Lex's head pulled him closer to Clark.

Clark moved them slowly, more slowly than Lex had, and he was careful not to push too far, never going in far enough to trigger Lex's gag reflex. Lex wondered if it was perverse that Clark's gentleness was turning Lex on far more than the wildest encounters of his misspent youth ever had. Clark's cock was in his mouth, but Lex felt like he was the one being caressed.

"Lex." Clark sounded like he was coming undone, and Lex wanted to touch him, to offer comfort, but he couldn't bear to shatter the moment.

A heartbeat later Clark came. Salty fluid filled Lex's mouth, but he couldn't swallow. He was too busy trying not to bite as his own orgasm shuddered through him.

He was still trying to swallow when Clark slid his cock from Lex's mouth and dropped to the floor in front of him. "Jesus, Lex."

"Yeah," Lex murmured, pulling Clark to him. He was fairly certain that he was holding Clark too tightly, but Clark didn't complain so Lex just held on.

Clark relaxed his hold on Lex distressingly quickly, reaching up to touch Lex's lips with his fingertips. "You've got come on your face," Clark said, his voice almost a whisper. Before Lex could respond, Clark leaned in and cleaned the corner of Lex's mouth with his lips and tongue. Pulling back, Clark stroked the side of Lex's face and Lex closed his eyes, unable to handle both the wonder in Clark's face and the affection in his touch.

Clark's hand moved lower, over his neck, and then down the center of his chest to his softening cock.

Lex opened his eyes to see Clark studying the damp spot on the front of Lex's pants. For the first time in years, Lex felt himself flush. Clark raised his eyes from Lex's groin to his face, and Lex tried to think of something to say. Clark didn't say a word. He just smiled his 'that is so cool' smile, and Lex had to bite back a grin. Clark was clearly quite pleased with himself. Of course, had Lex been in Clark's place, he would have been pretty damn pleased with himself too. Still, that look had to go. Eventually.

***

Lex was just finishing his dinner when Enrique ushered Clark into the dining room. Lex couldn't stop the smile that was spreading across his face, but it faltered when he realized that Clark wasn't smiling back. "Clark?"

"Can we talk?"

"Sure." Abandoning his dinner and the latest issue of The Economist, Lex led the way to his office. Something told him this wasn't a conversation they should have in the relatively open dining room.

Clark went straight to the couch while Lex closed the double doors behind them. Lex approached the couch slowly. Clark looked frightened. It wasn't a good look on him. "What's wrong?"

"I need to ask you something about last night."

Bracing himself, Lex sat and Clark turned to face him. "Why did you surrender to me like that?"

"I thought you liked it." It wasn't an answer, and Lex knew it.

"I did. It's just…You're Lex Luthor, man with a thousand and one control issues. You don't just let go like that."

"Not usually, no."

"So why did you?"

"Because it felt good." Lex rested a hand on Clark's arm. "What's wrong Clark?"

Clark looked at the floor. "It's one of those things I can't tell you."

Yet it involves our sex life, Lex wanted to say, but he'd made a promise. "Okay."

Clark was still looking at the floor. "All day I kept thinking that I'd influenced you in way, made you do something you didn't want to do. I know it sounds crazy."

From anyone else it would have sounded crazy, but this was Clark Kent, and there was genuine fear in his voice. "Listen to me, Clark," Lex said, keeping his voice soft but firm. "I've told you things I have never shared with anyone else, and probably never will. I confide in you because I trust you. What happened last night was simply an extension of that trust."

"I…" Stopping, Clark studied Lex's face for a moment and then covered Lex's hand with his own. "Okay."

Lex smiled. "Anything else on your mind?"

Clark's answering smile was so wickedly flirtatious that it made Lex wonder where he'd learned it. "Maybe."

***

Lex groaned. Clark's mouth was making it's way slowly down his neck, and Clark's hands were under his shirt, stroking his back. Lex clung to Clark. He'd never understood that desire leaving you weak-kneed analogy until now. Clark paused in his exploration of Lex's neck and Lex immediately claimed a kiss. Lex had rapidly come to the conclusion that kissing Clark was something to be done at every available opportunity.

"I want you." Clark's voice was low; it sent a shiver through Lex.

"You have me."

"Inside me."

"God, Clark." Lex buried his face in Clark's neck.

"If you don't want—"

"I want. Believe me, I want. It's just…hearing you say it like that."

Clark chuckled.

"You're way too confident."

"Only with you."

Lex didn't answer. He was too busy opening the buttons on Clark's shirt. Pushing it off, he ran his hands over broad shoulders and then down across Clark's chest. Clark's body was firmer and smoother than any Lex had ever touched. It excited him more than was probably safe or wise, but Lex didn't care. All he cared about was getting closer to Clark, feeling more of him.

Clark tugged at Lex's shirt, and Lex lifted his arms, allowing Clark to pull it over his head. They resumed kissing, hands tugging at one another's pants. Unfortunately, neither was willing to back away far enough for the other to work and they succeeded mostly in getting in one another's way.

Lex stepped back, out of Clark's arms. "How about I take off mine and you take off yours?"

Clark didn't bother answering. He simply pushed down both jeans and boxers in one swift, graceful movement. Lex would have been more impressed if he'd remembered to take off his sneakers first. Clark stood on one foot, trying to untie his sneaker. The jeans around his ankles prevented him from lifting his foot quite high enough however.

Lex fought back a chuckle and pushed Clark onto the bed. Kneeling, he untied and removed first one sneaker and then the other. Once the shoes were out of the way, he pulled off Clark's remaining clothes and stood. Eyes on Clark's face, Lex finished unzipping his pants. Allowing himself a small smirk, he toed off his shoes before pushing his pants and boxers to the floor. A small tug on each sock and he was nude. He took a step toward Clark, then another, stopping when he stood between Clark's legs.

"You," Clark whispered.

"What?" Lex asked, almost as breathless as Clark.

"I never thought another guy's body would turn me on," Clark answered, his eyes moving slowly up Lex's body to his face.

Lex raised a hand to Clark's cheek. "You excite me, too." Clark leaned into the caress, lifting his hands to Lex's waist. Tangling his hands in Clark's hair, Lex leaned down for a kiss. He had intended it to be slow and sensual. Instead it was urgent, almost desperate.

"Lex, please," Clark murmured when they separated.

Lex responded with another kiss. This one was desperate. Clark began to whimper, clearly wanting more than kisses. Lex wanted more too, but he couldn't bring himself to release the mouth being offered up to his. He was tasting Clark, and Clark was open and wet and inviting beneath him.

Pulling away, Clark rested his forehead against Lex's chest. "I need you."

Lex rubbed his cheek against the top of Clark's head and stroked the back of Clark's neck with his hands. "Anything, Clark, I'll give you anything."

Clark lifted his face and looked directly into Lex's eyes. "I want you inside me."

Lex groaned and Clark lifted a hand to Lex's face, gently brushing his fingers over Lex's cheek.

"Lie back."

Clark moved to the center of the bed. Lex opened the drawer in his nightstand and took out a bottle of Wet and a couple of condoms. Climbing onto the bed, he knelt between Clark's spread thighs and looked down at his lover. Clark didn't have the body of a sixteen year old. The broad shoulders and chest that should have been at least partially still potential were completely filled out. Clark's body was all muscular contours and it was only when you looked at his face that he looked sixteen—wide, bright eyes and an open, ready smile. But the eyes were becoming guarded and the smile less frequent. It made Lex want to stop time, protect Clark from everything and everyone who might hurt him.

"I need you to promise me something," Lex said. "Promise me that if I hurt you, even a little, or make you uncomfortable, you'll tell me."

"You won't hurt me."

"Promise."

"I promise."

Lex smiled. "Do you know how this works?"

"Yes, Lex. I can read."

"Humor me. Contrary to popular opinion, I'm not an expert on the deflowering of virgin farm boys."

Clark rolled toward the edge of the bed, although Lex was still between his legs.

"Where are you going?" Lex demanded.

"I wanted an expert."

Grabbing Clark's shoulder, Lex pushed him onto his back and leaned over him. "You're not going anywhere."

Taking hold of Lex's shoulders, Clark pulled him down and into a fierce, possessive kiss. "No, I'm not." Left unspoken were the words 'and neither are you,' but they were there nonetheless.

Lex couldn't be bothered to answer, not when Clark's lips were so close. He sucked on Clark's lower lip, hard and fast, before slipping his tongue into Clark's mouth. Clark whimpered and squirmed beneath him, trying to get closer, and that just made it hotter. Clark sucked on Lex's tongue and Lex thrust against him.

Clark slipped a hand between them and pushed gently on Lex's chest, forcing him back. Lex moaned in protest.

"Stop," Clark panted. "I'll come if you don't."

Lex sucked in a ragged breath. "Okay, okay." Gathering what remained of his self-control, he shifted back onto his knees and picked up the lube he'd left lying on the bed. He could feel Clark's eyes on him as he snapped open the bottle and squeezed some onto his fingertips, but he didn't dare look at Clark's face. He lowered his hand to Clark's entrance and circled it with a single finger, feeling wrinkled skin and a smattering of hair.

Clark gasped and pulled his legs back, exposing more of himself to Lex's touch and Lex's gaze. Unable to resist the impulse, Lex pushed inside. There was pressure, but no resistance, and Lex's breath caught as he watched his finger slide slowly into Clark.

Clark was warm inside, and smooth, and close. Just the idea of feeling Clark surrounding his cock had Lex almost coming. Ignoring his own arousal, he focused his attention on Clark. Carefully, he pulled his finger back and then eased it forward again. Clark's arms were stretched out at his sides and he was clutching fistfuls of the comforter in his hands. His legs were drawn back, knees in the air. His mouth was open and he was staring at Lex. Desire, pleasure, and need were written across his face and they were all for Lex, because of Lex.

"You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen."

Clark started to smile, but Lex moved his finger slightly deeper and the smile was lost in Clark's moan.

Lex added a second finger. This time he didn't hesitate. He went directly to the place that had made Clark moan and brushed his fingers over it, eliciting another moan. Lex drew back a little before touching it again.

"Now. Please, Lex. Can't wait."

Lex wanted more preparation, but he couldn't deny the need he heard in Clark's voice. Carefully withdrawing his fingers, he reached for one of the condoms lying on the bed.

Clark got there first. "Can I?" he asked, holding the small packet in his hand.

Swallowing, Lex nodded.

Clark tore open the plastic, and eased the condom over the head of Lex's cock. The he squeezed the small reservoir at the end closed while using his other hand to unroll the rest of the condom. "Health class," he explained with a smile, "They made us practice on bananas."

Lex burst out laughing. He laughed longer and harder than the joke merited, resting his forehead on Clark's shoulder.

Clark put an arm around Lex's shaking shoulders and whispered, "There wasn't really any practicing. Although the teacher did demonstrate." He paused. "On a zucchini."

Lex lifted his head. "You're a bad boy, Clark Kent."

"I know," Clark said, before kissing him. No desperation this time, just tenderness and longing so deep it made Lex ache.

It made Clark ache too. Lex was sure of it, because when he opened his eyes, Clark's face was mere inches from his own and he was cupping Lex's head in his hands, gently, as though he feared Lex might break. "I couldn't do this with anyone but you. I don't think I'd even want to."

Lex swallowed. He wanted to say something, but the words wouldn't come. Luckily Clark didn't seem to expect an answer. He pressed his lips to Lex's again, briefly, and lay back on the bed.

Reaching for the lube, Lex squirted a generous amount onto his palm and then smeared it over the latex covering his cock. Stretching out above Clark and resting his weight on one hand, he positioned his cock at Clark's entrance with the other. "Remember, you promised," he said softly.

"I remember."

Satisfied, he pushed forward. There wasn't any resistance until he reached the second ring of muscle. He pressed gently against it until suddenly it gave way; Lex stopped, partway inside, breathing heavily and staring at the man beneath him. "Okay?"

Clark nodded.

"No pain?"

Clark shook his head. "I feel stretched, but it doesn't hurt. I like the idea of you stretching me."

A surge of affection went through him, catching Lex off-guard, and he dropped his head, not quite able to look at Clark's face. Looking down brought the place where they were joined into view, and the sight of his cock partway inside Clark sharpened his desire, made him need to be all of the way inside. Trying desperately not to go too fast, Lex pushed forward. Clark opened to him. Just opened, like it was the most natural thing in the world. Maybe it was.

Lex didn't stop pushing until he was all of the way in. Raising his gaze from their joined bodies, he searched Clark's face, looking for signs of discomfort.

Clark lifted himself onto one elbow and placed a light kiss on Lex's lips. "You feel so good."

"So do you."

Clark shifted back onto the bed. "Move, Lex. I want to feel you moving inside me."

Lex inhaled sharply, now certain that Clark said things like that knowing exactly what their effect on Lex would be. Doing as Clark had asked, he drew his hips slowly back and then eased them forward again.

Clark's body caressed him, held him and caressed him. Even through the latex, he could feel Clark's warmth and the smoothness of his flesh, and the tightness which yielded enough to let him in, but still held him impossibly close. Better still was Clark's response. Lex couldn't tear his eyes from Clark's face, from the pleasure he saw there. He wanted to memorize every sound Clark made, every quiet moan and indrawn breath.

He moved slowly, wanting to prolong it as long as he could, but Clark was getting close. His legs were opening and closing around Lex's waist, and he was lifting his hips into the air, trying to match Lex's movements. Lex responded by moving the tiniest bit faster and going just a bit deeper.

Clark came when Lex was all of the way inside him, his entire body shaking and his cock jerking in the air between them until Lex took it in hand. Lex didn't stroke it. He couldn't. He was too busy coming, emptying himself into Clark with an intensity that would have frightened him if he'd been able to feel anything but pleasure and Clark.

Still shaking, Lex lowered himself onto Clark, who immediately wrapped his arms around Lex. Clark was still trembling, and they held one another until long after the trembling had stopped and Lex's softening cock had slipped from Clark's body.

It was Lex who moved first. Reluctantly shifting back onto his knees, he slid the condom off of his cock and dropped it into the wastebasket on the far side of the bed. He nestled into Clark's side, resting his head on Clark's shoulder.

"I don't get it," Clark said, his arms once again wrapped around Lex.

"Don't get what?"

"How you get anything done. How anyone gets anything done when they could be doing this."

Lex had to agree. He was fairly certain he wasn't going to be all that productive tomorrow, or the next day. "It doesn't usually feel like this."

"It doesn't?"

"No."

"So what's it like, usually?"

"Better than driving, say a Jaguar, but not as good as a Lamborghini."

Clark chuckled.

Lex lifted himself onto an elbow and gazed down at his friend. "But you, you're better than flying an F-16."

"You've flown an F-16?"

"No, but I have a vivid imagination."

Clark smiled, clearly amused, but when he spoke his tone was serious, "It's never been like this for you with anyone else?"

"No, never, just you."

Clark's smile broadened. He looked inordinately pleased with himself. On anyone else Lex would have found that look insufferable, but it made Lex want to kiss Clark. So he did.

$$$$ Clark was asleep, his head resting on Lex's chest. Lex stroked Clark's hair and tried to think. He couldn't decide if he'd failed miserably or succeeded beyond his wildest dreams. He had betrayed Helen, a woman he cared for, but he'd gotten Clark, who was everything Lex had thought he would never have.

This was the fourth night Lex had held Clark like this, the fourth time they'd made love, and Lex still didn't understand it, how the mood could change from playful to passionate to heartbreakingly tender in a heartbeat. It really was like nothing he'd ever experienced before. Clark made him feel stripped bare and completely safe. He trusted Clark, more fully than he'd ever trusted anyone, even though he knew there were huge parts of his life that Clark couldn't, or wouldn't, share with him. He remembered Clark describing his own contradictory feelings for Lex. Clark was right. It was complicated.

Helen was coming home tomorrow and Lex needed to decide what he was going to do. The smart thing would be to stay with her. All of the reasons he'd had for asking her to move in with him still held, and he could continue to see Clark, with Helen's presence providing a convenient smokescreen.

Lex couldn't do it. It felt too much like a betrayal, not of Helen, but of Clark.

Lex had created this mess, and now he'd have to fix it.

***

Clark was lying on the couch in his fortress when Lex entered. He sat up when he caught sight of Lex. "Hey."

"Hey." Lex sat on the opposite end of the couch from Clark, and looked straight ahead. "I ended it with Helen."

Clark didn't say anything and Lex turned to look at him. "I guess I should say I'm sorry," Clark offered.

"But you're not."

"I'm sorry she got hurt, but I'm glad you picked me."

"It was never a contest, Clark." Lex rose and went to the window at the front of the barn. The view was surprisingly pretty, ordered fields and quaint houses beneath a blue sky. He wondered what Helen would think of it.

"I am sorry, Lex. I know you cared about her." Clark was standing off to the side, slightly behind Lex.

"I'm bad at this. Relationships. I don't have a lot of experience with loving people."

"My father claims love is one of the things Kents are good at."

Lex snorted softly.

"Along with pig-headedness and growing vegetables."

Lex couldn't help it; he chuckled.

Clark placed a hand on his shoulder and turned him so that they were facing one another. "We can make it work."

"I just failed again, Clark, and now us. You, with your trust issues, and me with my control issues. We'll make a nice, balanced couple."

"You're right."

"I am?" Lex wasn't sure being right was a good thing.

"Come with me," Clark said, grabbing Lex's hand and tugging him toward the stairs.

"Where are we going?"

"There's something I need to show you."

This was it. Clark's big secret. Suddenly, Lex wasn't sure he wanted to know. He was even less sure when Clark stopped in front of two wooden doors that led down into the ground. "I need to see the storm cellar?"

"No. You need to see what's in the storm cellar," Clark replied, pulling open the doors.

"The name Stephen King mean anything to you, Clark?"

Clark started down the stairs and Lex followed him. The cellar was dark until Clark tugged on a light, revealing a large round something, covered by a tarp. Striding over to it, Clark pulled off the covering.

The object beneath wasn't so much round as egg-shaped. Reminding himself to breathe, Lex stepped forward and ran a hand over the surface. It looked like metal, but it felt rougher.

"It's a spaceship."

"I can see that."

"It's my spaceship, the one that brought me here."

Lex turned to stare at Clark. "Brought you here?"

Clark nodded.

"You're an alien." Lex heard his voice getting louder, but he couldn't seem to lower it. "And you told me!"

"Trust, Lex."

"Trust?" Lex forced himself to speak and not shout. "This secret could get you killed." Lex paced across the small room, away from Clark.

"You're angry? All this time you've been pushing me to tell you and now you're angry?"

Disbelief and betrayal, Lex recognized the tone. He inhaled deeply and rubbed the back of his head. "It's a dangerous secret, Clark. One you shouldn't share."

"Even with you?"

"I understand why you did it, but you didn't need to prove anything to me."

"That's not why I did it." Clark stepped backward into the stairwell and sat. "I need someone I can talk to Lex, someone I can trust. Things are happening to me." He looked across the cellar directly at Lex. "I'm scared."

A few quick steps and Lex was kneeling in front of him. "I'm sorry, Clark. It's just, if the wrong people found out, the things they would do to you…"

"Don't you think I don't know that? It's been drilled into me my entire life. Keep your head down. Don't let anyone see what you can do. Don't get noticed. Don't tell."

"I'll keep your secret, Clark."

"I know you will."

"And you don't have to hide from me." Lex rested both hands on Clark's knees. "Tell me what you're scared of."

"The night you found me on the road. I don't know how I got there. I kept having the same dream over and over. I was flying over Smallville."

"You can do that?"

"No, but I float sometimes."

"Float? What else—" Lex shook his head. There'd be time for that later. "You were dreaming about flying."

Clark nodded. "I flew to the caves, and then I took the key, and—"

"Key?"

"The octagonal disk."

"My paperweight? I thought my father had it."

"Mom took it from him."

"Good for her."

Clark smiled before continuing. "I put it in this hole in the cave wall."

"And then what?"

"Then you almost hit me with your car."

Realization struck and Lex closed his eyes. "I hit you. On the bridge."

"Yeah, you did."

Lex opened his eyes to find himself looking into Clark's. "Thank God you aren't human." Leaning in he kissed Clark quick and hard. "So what happened in the caves?"

"I put the disk in the hole and this light shot of it and into me. It knocked me out and when I woke up I knew the language, the one on the walls."

"Jesus."

"That's not all. Before I went to the caves there was this buzzing in my head, so loud it hurt. I went to the caves to make it stop. I had to go. I didn't have a choice."

"And that scared you."

"Yes, no. There's a message from my father, my biological father, in the ship. He said…" Clark stopped and Lex squeezed his knees reassuringly. "He said, 'They're a flawed race. Rule them with strength.'"

Suddenly Clark's fear of having influenced Lex made a lot more sense. "Maybe we're brothers after all."

Clark snorted softly, his lips curling into an almost smile.

Lex pressed a hand to his friend's cheek. "You don't have to be what he wants you to be."

"That's what my father says, but what if I don't have a choice? What if it's programmed into me somehow?"

"I wish I can tell you that isn't a possibility, Clark, but I can tell you it's not likely."

"Something drove me to the caves."

"Yes, but I think that was probably a way to make certain you got the information you needed. The variables, the circumstances, were fairly predictable, but programming you to take over the world, that would be much harder."

"I guess." Clark didn't sound all that reassured.

"You're missing something crucial, Clark. The person who wrote that message may have given you his DNA, but Martha and Jonathon Kent are your parents. You said it yourself, the Kents know about love." Lex squeezed Clark's shoulder. "And they know about compassion, and they taught you those things." Leaning in Lex pressed a gentle kiss to Clark's lips. "They raised a man even a Luthor could trust."

Clark smiled, the broad smile Lex loved. "And who could trust a Luthor."

Lex couldn't help but think that he would be more pleased with that statement if it didn't sound quite so na´ve. Still, it made him feel good. "Is this one of those sometimes when you want to hold me?"

"Now that you mention it, yes." Clark reached for him, and Lex relaxed against his lover.

Wrapping his arms around Clark, Lex closed his eyes. Clark trusted him. Clark believed in him. And he believed in Clark. What more was there?