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A Many Splendored Thing

chelle and The Grrrl

Title: A Many Splendored Thing

Authors: chelle and The Grrrl

Authors' emails: and

Authors' URL: and

Fandom: Atlantis

Category: Slash

Pairing: McKay/Sheppard

Archive: Ask first

Rating: NC-17

AN: Inspired by this piece of artwork drawn by melagan.

"Shouldn't that be somewhere else, maybe powering something?" John asked shifting his gaze from Rodney to the ZPM on the floor near Rodney's bed.

"I'll install it tomorrow. I'm too tired now."

Rodney didn't look tired. He looked happy, excited, pleased with himself, pretty much exactly how John would expect him to look with a ZPM on the floor next to his bed.

At least it wasn't in the bed. John didn't think he could handle that kind of competition. Something clicked, and John felt his eyes narrowing almost automatically. "Wait a minute, since when are you too tired to install a ZPM?"

Rodney bounced onto the bed, then caught himself and sat still, hands clasped in his lap. His eyes shifted away from John's. "Just what I said. Tired. Really, really tired." He stretched and yawned theatrically.

"Well, if you're so tired, then I'd better go so you can get your beauty sleep." John turned and walked toward the door, taking his time, dragging one foot after the other. Waiting...waiting...

"Okay, okay, okay," Rodney burst out. "Maybe I'm not too tired."

Pivoting, John asked, "You're not?"

"Not for everything."

"So you're not too tired for…"

"Sex." Rodney smiled at him hopefully. "I'm not too tired for sex."

John yawned.

Rodney rose from the bed and placed himself directly in front of John. "And you aren't either."

"I don't know. It was a long…" Rodney cupped John's cock through his pants. John looked down at Rodney's hand and his traitorous dick. "Day."

Rodney rocked forward. He was practically bouncing. "Good, good." He glanced over his shoulder. "Come on then." One last squeeze of John's cock and Rodney was dragging him over to the bed, hand hooked around John's elbow, all eagerness and excitement and showing no signs of fatigue whatsoever.

Puzzled, John stopped. Then it hit him. He planted his feet and yanked his arm free. "Just hold it a minute. Rodney, I don't believe you--you want to do it with the ZPM in the room, don't you?"

"No, I--well," Rodney blustered. "Well, maybe."

"That's why you didn't want to install it yet. Too tired, my ass. I've seen you pop those things in while sleepwalking."

"No, not true. It's a very complicated--"

"Oh come on, you put in the little round hole and push, I've seen you do it."

Rodney raised his brows. "Have I mentioned how much I love it when you talk dirty?"

John tried to keep a straight face. He put every bit of determination he possessed into keeping his lips from curving. Unfortunately, his determination was no match for a happy, horny Rodney. "You're topping."

Rodney nodded. "I am good at pushing things into holes."

Groaning, John dropped onto the bed on his back, arms spread, feet still on the floor. "Remind me again why I sleep with you."

"Because I'm good at pushing things into holes." Rodney stretched out over him, his knees on either side of John's hips and his hands just above John's shoulders. "Weren't you listening?"

"I always listen to you." John paused. "Except for those times when I don't."

Rodney leaned down until his nose nearly touched John's. "I know how to get your attention," he said, voice low and suggestive. His eyes flicked down to John's lips.

John held still, expecting the kiss, the push of Rodney's hips, the touch of his hands, anything, but Rodney did nothing. He simply watched as John waited.


"Hey," John complained a moment later. "Very funny." He grabbed Rodney's head and pulled him down into a kiss.

Rodney grinned against his mouth. John kept kissing him, teasing Rodney's lips with his own until Rodney gave in and kissed him back. Rodney had a surprising amount of enthusiasm for someone so tired.

John wrapped his arms around Rodney's neck, holding him in place, and forgot about everything but the sweet pressure of Rodney's lips on his until Rodney pushed against him.

Even with four layers of clothing between them, John liked the feel of Rodney's cock brushing against him, the solid bulge of it visible evidence of the way John turned Rodney on. Not that turning Rodney on was difficult. A ZPM could probably do it.

John groaned. Rodney nibbled on the side of his neck. "Tell me that's for me and not the ZPM."

"What's for you?"

John shifted, rubbing his hip against Rodney's erection. "That."

"Of course it's for you. It's not like I can stick it in the ZPM."

"God, Rodney, let's not even go there, okay?" John grimaced.

"What?" Rodney raised his head and stared down at him. "You went there first."

"I did not, and you're a pervert for even thinking it."

Rodney beamed, as if John had just paid him a huge compliment. "I am, aren't I?"

John shook his head, then tugged on Rodney's shirt in an ineffectual attempt to remove it. Rodney obliged him by sitting back and pulling it off over his head, emerging with ruffled hair and a dreamy look. "But just think--all that contained energy, locked up right there, in that tiny space--subspace, actually. The basic energy of the universe. Right there." Rodney pointed, then rested his hands on his hips, gazing in wonder at the floor beside the bed.

"Hello?" John said. He gave a little wave.

Rodney looked up at him. "Why are you still dressed?"

John rolled his eyes.

Edging backward, Rodney stood and began undoing his pants. "Well?" he asked, looking down at John. "Chop, chop."

John stared at him for a moment. He was having sex with a man who said "chop, chop" and talked about subspace in bed.

Boots, pants, and socks removed, Rodney spread his arms and gazed steadily at John.

And had little pi symbols on his underwear.

"Rodney." Staring, John sat up, then closed his mouth. He had no words.


Brows raised, eyes bright and sparkly (because, of course, ZPM), cock bulging against ridiculous boxers, it was too much for John to resist. He grabbed Rodney around the waist and flipped him down onto the bed, rolling on top and holding him down. Rodney let out a surprised "oh" and John swallowed it with a kiss, continuing with hard, biting kisses across Rodney's mouth, his cheek, his throat. When he sucked on a nipple, Rodney squirmed beneath him.

"Oh god, yes--contained energy," Rodney said with a gasp.

John laughed against his chest, then swept his hands down Rodney's body, from his shoulders to his waist, catching hold of the waistband of his boxers and pulling them off. He tossed them over the side of the bed and Rodney twisted around to watch them land softly next to the damn ZPM.

Resisting the urge to point out that he was a power source, too, John pushed him back on the bed and closed his hand around Rodney's cock.

"Oh," Rodney said.

"Yes, oh," John answered, stroking him from base to tip and then rubbing the head with his thumb the way Rodney liked. Leaning down, he kissed Rodney again, the kind of kiss Rodney couldn't possibly ignore.

Humming happily, Rodney sucked on John's tongue, making John's hips buck against him without John's permission. Ignoring his protesting cock, John lifted his hips away from Rodney's groin and slid downward until he was level with Rodney's cock.

Flushed red with arousal, it remained standing even when John let go of it, clearly wanting attention. Attention a ZPM couldn't give it. Smiling to himself, John touched the tip of his tongue to the slit, tasting the tiny drop of precome.

Rodney shivered all over.

John brushed his lips against the top, then slid down one side, hard cock gliding across his lips in a long, smooth kiss. Rodney was going to push that cock inside of him and John was going to spread his legs wide for it. For Rodney. It was going to be good, Rodney was going to touch him just right, with his fingers, with his cock, with his whole damn body. John pressed a kiss to the base of Rodney's cock, nuzzling into the coarse hair and breathing him in. Lush with sweat, the way Rodney smelled always made him even harder.

"Feel free to tease me to death, okay?" Rodney's voice was high and tight. He was propped up on his elbows, watching with a pained expression.

"Don't tell me I've finally gotten your attention."

"Again, I ask: why are you still dressed?" Rodney frowned at him.

John sighed and stood, pulling his shirt over his head.

"Keep going." Rodney slid his hand up over his hip to his cock.

Wrapping his hand around Rodney's wrist, John lifted Rodney's hand away from his cock. "Don't you dare."

"Fine, fine, just get undressed."

"I'm trying to."

Rodney placed his hand on the bed, closing it into a fist. Eyes still narrowed with suspicion, John bent to untie his boots and then stood to toe them off. Rodney's hands were still at his sides. Undoing his pants, John pushed them to the floor. Cock poking out of his boxers, he put his hands on his hips and smiled at Rodney. "Satisfied?"

Rodney's eyes moved slowly down his body. "You're still wearing your socks."

John reached down and pulled first one, then the other sock off. "How's that?"

"Oh, that's good." Rodney sat up. "If you want me to fuck you through your boxers, that is." He crossed his arms over his chest and raised his chin.

The pose didn't wasn't nearly as effective when he was naked and erect, but John wasn't about to tell him that. Instead John just took it in--sprawled legs, stiff cock, the haughty expression-- and tried not to smile.

"Not that you don't look good like that. Just--just get over here." Rodney took John by the hips and pulled him closer to the bed.

Warm mouth on his stomach and John might have groaned a little as Rodney sucked on his skin. Looking down, he watched Rodney kiss him; sliding his fingers into Rodney's hair, he caressed him in return. Rodney made a happy sound and sucked on the skin over John's ribs. It was a place where he was normally ticklish, but Rodney didn't tickle. Then he moved on to another sensitive place and then another, his hands sliding down to cup John's ass.

John might have groaned again when Rodney's fingers traced the space between his buttocks, the thin fabric of his boxers only adding to the sensation. When Rodney smiled up at him, all smug pride, John kissed him. Then he whispered the words guaranteed to get him Rodney's undivided attention, "Fuck me."

Rodney made a small, almost whiny sound, and pushed John's boxers down, his mouth seeking John's. This kiss was delightfully dirty, wonderfully dirty, on its way to downright filthy.

John's boxers were stuck around his thighs and John tried to push them down without breaking the kiss. His foot caught and Rodney steadied him while he reached down to remove them. Turning slightly, he dropped them on top of the ZPM.

"Good, good, good," Rodney muttered against John's throat. "Naked." His hands slid down to cover John's ass. Hungry for touch, John edged forward to kneel on the bed.

"Suck me first."

Rodney's head immediately dipped down and then John's cock slid into a warm, wonderful place, slick and wet. The shock of pleasure took his breath away. Rodney's mouth always startled him, his words, his kisses and this, especially this, the slow slide of lips and tongue, heat and suction. As Rodney worked his cock John was almost tempted to simply let go, to come in Rodney's mouth but no, he wanted something else tonight. Something he'd still feel in the morning when they all crowded around to watch Rodney push that ZPM in place, making the entire city come to life.

He touched the side of Rodney's head and with great effort pulled his hips back. "Oh, whoa, that's enough. God that's good."

Rodney stroked John's thigh, then tugged on John's hip, turning him around so that he was on his hands and knees, facing the head of the bed. "Let's do it like this, okay? Do you want to? God, you're beautiful like this."

"This is good." It was exactly what John wanted, to be on his hands and knees, with Rodney pushing into him, fucking him, and sometimes they were so in sync it was freaky.

"Yes, yes it is." Rodney knelt by John's side, absently patting his back with one hand while getting the lube from under the pillow with the other.

"I still can't believe you keep the lube there."

Rodney didn't answer, and John turned his head to watch Rodney cover his fingers with the slick fluid.

He startled a little when Rodney touched his opening, but then settled into the familiar touch, moving his hips back, inviting Rodney inside. Pressing his lips to the back of John's neck, Rodney eased two fingers into John. Rodney's mouth touching such a vulnerable place, teasing, making him shiver, at the same time Rodney worked his fingers into John, stretching, fucking, holding John in place, was almost too much.

His chest brushed John's side and Rodney began kissing his way down John's back. He turned his fingers, coating John's insides with lube, getting him ready. John was so ready Rodney could probably fuck him with the ZPM. Which Rodney would no doubt be happy to do, except it was too big. But something else, something that would fit. Maybe Rodney could fuck him with something else. There had to be a dildo somewhere in Atlantis.

Rodney would watch as he worked it in and out of John…

Biting back a moan, John shoved back against Rodney's fingers.

"All right, hang on," Rodney told him gently. "Almost there."

"Rodney." John gave up and moaned, feeling shameless. "Having trouble with containment here. Could blow at any minute."

Rodney's forehead thumped against John's back. "Your metaphors really suck, you know that?" But his fingers slipped out and he moved closer, knees between John's legs, spreading them further apart.

John braced himself, palms flat against the mattress. "Push it into the damn hole, Rodney." He tried to find his command voice, but that was long gone, Rodney had chased it away, and John found himself laughing instead, and that was almost immediately replaced by "oh god, yes, that's it, that's it" as Rodney pushed inside of him.

With an arm around John's waist, Rodney held them both steady, letting John stretch, letting his body get used to the intrusion. "Shouldn't you be lighting up at this point?" Rodney asked, breathless. "Hyperdrive engines coming on line, perhaps?"

John laughed again, his whole body shaking with it. Laughing with a cock in his ass felt strange and he laughed even harder. "And you complain about my metaphors," he said, or tried to say, only about two-thirds of the syllables making it out through his laughter.

Rodney didn't answer. He was resting his forehead on John's back, laughing almost as hard as John was. Finally, he calmed enough to choke out, "You're killing the mood."

"Me?" John's laughter had eased to a burbly chuckle. "You said hyperdrive, during sex." He contracted the muscles in his ass, squeezing Rodney's cock. "You don't seem to be losing the mood."

With a gasp, Rodney answered, "Not so much, no."

This was why he had sex with Rodney, because it was fun, and sometimes ridiculous, and pretty much always hot. "So fuck me already."

"Well, since you refuse to fly around the galaxy for me, I suppose I'll have to."

Bizarre images filled John's head.

"Rodney," John protested with choked laughter. Then Rodney thrust, and John wasn't laughing anymore, all he could manage was a low moan in a voice he hardly recognized as his own but god, it was good good, freakishly good. He loved being fucked, and Rodney could fuck like a man possessed, hard and fast. Hands sliding on the bed, John spread his fingers, trying to keep from moving forward. "Yeah, yeah, come on Rodney," he panted, egging him on.

"Come here," Rodney said, grabbing John's hips and pulling him back into place. "Oh god, you're so--this is so--"

His rough hand gripped John's cock and it was perfect, being worked inside and out, body singing with pleasure and sweat and heat and Rodney was god damn brilliant, there was nothing in two galaxies better than this--

Rodney's hips jerked, then stilled. "Oh god damn it." He clutched at John and moaned, body shaking. "You, you, this is entirely your fault."

John dropped his head slightly, a disappointed groan escaping as he felt Rodney's cock pulse inside him. Damn ZPM.

"Sorry, sorry," Rodney muttered, patting John's back. He sighed, pressed a kiss to John's skin, then leaned heavily. "Although it's your own fault," he continued a moment later. "You get me so damn hot, with the brains and the coolness and piloting spaceships."

John brightened slightly. Rodney was making him sound like Han Solo.

"And then the way you look," Rodney said, one hand sliding up and down John's chest while the other toyed with his cock, "and the way you sound, and the way you feel. Who could resist that? It's like you were designed to make me lose control."

Maybe John could forgive him. Maybe. Since it was partly his own fault. But he still wanted to be fucked. "You wouldn't," John licked his lower lip, "you wouldn't have a dildo, would you?"

Rodney froze. "Yes?"

John looked over his shoulder at Rodney. "You do?"

Rodney nodded.

His admiration for Rodney growing, because Rodney had managed to bring a dildo to another galaxy, John said, "Could you? Would you?"

"Sure, um, I can do that," Rodney answered, pulling his hips back and withdrawing his softening cock from John's body.

Turning onto his side, John watched as Rodney went to his desk and rummaged around in the back of one of the drawers. Bending forward like that did really nice things to Rodney's already really nice ass, and John gave his cock an appreciative squeeze. Maybe he should forget the dildo and just fuck Rodney.

Then Rodney turned around, a triumphant smile on his face and a cloth bag in his hand. "Lorne's team found this in one of the rooms when they were okaying the new living quarters on the west side."

"Lorne found a dildo and he gave it to you?"

"It's an Ancient device," Rodney said kneeling on the edge of the bed, "and I'm the chief scientist."


Rodney pulled open the bag and withdrew a shiny black dildo. "Very lifelike, see? Although, maybe a bit larger than life." Rodney frowned at his own softened penis.

John nodded, heart beating faster. He reached out to touch. It was slick and hard but it had some give, like a dense silicone. Then pulled his hand back, worried. "This isn't a bizarre ancient device that's going to activate in some way when we use it, is it?"

Rodney shook his head. "No, it's technologically inert. It's just--well, it's a sex toy. I suppose some things are universal." He grinned at John.

John decided that Rodney looked pretty damn cute, grinning like that with a dildo in hand. John flopped onto his back and spread his legs. "So, what are you waiting for?"

Eyeing John's exposed crotch, Rodney's grin broadened. "Now there's an invitation, hmm?" He crawled between John's legs, pausing to kiss a knee before grabbing the lube.

"You'd think it would at least be self-lubing," John commented, watching Rodney spread the liquid over the surface.

Rodney snorted, then scooted closer. "So, uh, ready?"

"Ready." John put a foot up onto Rodney's shoulder and felt something cool and hard push against his opening. It felt bigger than it looked, every extra millimeter adding to the stretch. "God, Rodney."

"What, is this okay?" Rodney paused.

"No, no, no keep going, it's good, it's really really--" John arched his back and moaned as Rodney slid it in further. "Oh, man."

"It feels good, doesn't it?"

"Hell, yeah. It--wait, how do you know? You've used it, haven't you?"

"In the interests of scientific discovery, I may have conducted an experiment, or two, yes."

The thought of Rodney and the dildo, and the dildo in Rodney, made his pulse beat so hard he could actually feel it in his cock. Gripping the sheet in his hands, John bent one leg until his foot was on the bed and lifted his hips upward.

Rodney pushed the dildo in a little farther, and John closed his eyes, tilting his head back and groaning. He felt Rodney pull the dildo back and then push it in again, fucking him. John did his best to move his hips with Rodney's thrusts, but with his foot on Rodney's shoulder he could only manage small movements.

The dildo inside him was harder than a person could be, bigger, and completely unyielding. Finally, he was really being fucked; Rodney was fucking him with something that had been up in his own ass. Sliding a hand up to his cock, John curled it around the base.

Only to have it gently, but firmly moved away.

John opened his eyes when Rodney placed a hand under John's bent knee and eased his leg back. Replacing Rodney's hand with his own, he held himself open for Rodney, and Rodney pushed the dildo in again, farther this time. John gasped, feeling it everywhere, the sharp sizzle of pleasure right up through his cock, the pressure, the stretching--all of it wonderful. "Harder, do it harder."

Only Rodney didn't. He shoved it in and kept it there. Frustrated and a little frantic, John tried to protest but Rodney stretched out above him and silenced him with a kiss. "You're so hot like this," Rodney said. With a quick, hungry mouth, he kissed John again and again, until John was breathless.

"Rodney," John complained between kisses, although he had to touch Rodney, hands moving through Rodney's short hair, down his back and up over his shoulders. Legs pulled up, feet flat on the bed, John wriggled his hips, trying to get Rodney to move it again, damn it, to do something other than suck on his neck and throat and chest, and oh, nipple--John liked that. Arching his back, he held Rodney's head in place.

"Really, really hot," Rodney pulled back, sliding a heavy hand down John's chest.

Dismayed by the fact Rodney was simply looking at him, John tried to take matters into his own hands again, hands traveling toward his own cock, but Rodney intercepted them.

"No, no, no, let me--" Rodney dipped his head down and sucked John's cock into his mouth.

John groaned and lifted his hips, but Rodney drew back, sliding his mouth up John's cock, at the same time pulling the dildo almost out. His hands tightening into fists, John tensed everywhere, waiting. After a moment that lasted fucking forever, Rodney teased the head of John's cock with his tongue, and then slid his mouth downward, pushing the dildo inside, hard.

Thick hard shaft pushing into him, while Rodney sucked him, wet mouth and slurpy sounds. It was damned dirty, being fucked and sucked, opened and pleasured. The only thing which might have been better would have been a cock in his mouth at the same time, Rodney's cock. The thought was gone an instant later, when Rodney pushed the dildo in deep.

Anything but lying there and letting Rodney have him was more than John could manage. The pleasure, coming from two places at once, each feeding on the other until it felt like there was some kind of bizarre feedback loop between his ass and his cock, was almost too much. But he didn't want it to stop, even though he was right there. "Rodney," he begged, "Rodney."

And Rodney, Rodney slowed it down. He thrust the dildo just as deep, and he took John's cock just as far into his mouth, but he did it slower, keeping John suspended for another long moment, then another. But not even Rodney could defy gravity and suddenly John was coming, hard. His ass contracted around the thick, unyielding dildo, and that made it even better, made him release more fluid into Rodney's mouth.

Rodney swallowed, tugging at him, pulling the pleasure out of him, from his ass to his cock. He shook again as Rodney eased the dildo out of him, over-stimulated muscles twitching wildly and even that felt good, making him moan out loud.

When it was all over he lay flat on the bed, eyes closed, body limp and ridiculously content. He felt Rodney settle in next him. Soft lips brushed against his shoulder. "Good, huh?"

"Oh yeah." John turned and grinned at him.

Rodney nestled in closer, draping a leg over John. "I enjoyed it, too."

A hard cock nudged John's thigh. John reached down and wrapped his hand around it, raising his eyebrows questioningly.

"Well, what did you expect after that performance?" Rodney asked. "I'm only human. Brilliant, but human."

Touched, John squeezed Rodney's cock, then rubbed his palm over the head. Rodney's expression grew vague and a little dopey, and that was impossible to resist so John did it again. "I have an idea," he said.

"Really?" Rodney pushed into his hand.

"Yes, really. And I think you're going to like it."


"Turn over, and face the other way."

Clearly intrigued, Rodney rolled over without hesitation. "Hey," he said, peering down at the floor. "The ZPM is wearing your underwear."

"Tell it I'm going to want them back," John said. He felt around for the dildo.

"What are you up to, anyway?" Rodney twisted to look over his shoulder to see John with the uncapped lube in hand and the dildo in the other. "Oh. Oooh."

"Good idea?" John asked, even though with the way Rodney's face lit up, there wasn't any doubt.

"Amazing idea."

"Now turn back around and keep your eyes on that ZPM," John said.

Rodney was moaning even before John slipped his fingers inside of him.