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A Place to Stand


Title: A Place to Stand

Author: chelle

Author's email:

Author's URL:

Fandom: Atlantis

Archive: Ask first

Pairing: John/Rodney

Rating: NC 17

Title is from Elizabeth Barrett Browning:
Let us stay
Rather on earth, Beloved,--where the unfit
Contrarious moods of men recoil away
And isolate pure spirits, and permit
A place to stand and love in for a day

"How do you want to come?"

Rodney's voice is low and intent, so close to John's ear that it makes him shudder. John doesn't know how Rodney can expect him to answer with Rodney's hands on him and Rodney's lips brushing that spot on his neck. "Anything," John breathes. "Do anything you want to me." His own words send the lust inside him spiraling even higher.

"Anything?" Rodney asks, abandoning John's neck to look him in the eye.

John nods. "Yes." His heart is racing with the thought of being spread out for Rodney to do whatever Rodney wants.

Rodney kisses him. It's deep and full of want and it takes all of John's self-control not to wrap his arms around Rodney's neck and press his whole body into Rodney's. John groans when Rodney breaks the kiss, but he trails kisses down John's chest and John spreads his legs in anticipation. He's pretty sure he knows where Rodney's going, and he wants it, wants Rodney's mouth on him, wants Rodney to suck him, hold him down, demand John give it up for him.

But Rodney bypasses his cock in favor of nuzzling his balls. Rodney does that a lot and John's grown to like it, even though he's still not sure why Rodney does it. Rodney draws one into his mouth, sucking just hard enough to create a sweet tug of pleasure that goes straight through him. When Rodney shifts to the other side, John grabs the sheet to keep from sliding his fingers through Rodney's hair.

With a kiss to the backside of John's shaft, Rodney sits up and leans over, opening the drawer in the table next to his bed. He pulls out the lube and John spreads his legs even more. Opening the lube, Rodney squirts some onto two of his fingers, spreads it with his thumb.

"It's a little cold," Rodney says, before touching John's opening.

"It's okay." John doesn't mind the cold, not when it comes with Rodney's fingers.

Rodney breaches him and John makes a noise even he doesn't recognize. Then it's just the sweet, familiar stroke of Rodney's finger inside him, pressing, turning, touching him in ways no one else ever bothered to learn.

Rodney's touches only graze John's prostate. He can't avoid touching it, but he's not concentrating on it, not yet. Anticipation curls in John's belly, because he knows what it'll feel like when Rodney does.

Rodney's gaze is focused between John's legs, on the connection between them, and the look of concentration on his face is why John sometimes can't be around Rodney when he's working. Rodney gets that same look, and if John isn't distracted by impending doom, it makes him hard. Once Rodney asked why John had practically run from his lab. When John confessed to going back to his quarters to jerk-off, disbelief had flashed in Rodney's eyes, followed by a huge smile that had spread slowly across Rodney's face. Then he'd tackled John to the bed.

A second finger. John knows the ring of muscle guarding his entrance is pushing on Rodney's fingers, trying to compact them into one, but it feels good to him. He likes the idea of having more of Rodney inside him. He'd take Rodney's whole hand if he thought it'd fit.

The thought makes him close his eyes and pull in a breath. Jesus. He's never thought about anything like that before. Never wanted it, never imagined it. But now he can't let go of the idea of Rodney's fist inside him, filling him up with more of Rodney than he's ever taken, Rodney making John's body adjust so Rodney can find a place inside him.

Rodney touches his prostate, deliberately, both fingers moving across it and then back, never breaking contact.

John groans.

Rodney rubs the back of John's cock with his fingers and John opens his eyes. Rodney is looking at him. Rodney's an open book at the best of times, and when they're in bed he's practically a billboard. John can see everything Rodney's feeling and he wants it all, wants Rodney's love and Rodney's respect and Rodney's desire. He wants to be the first thing Rodney thinks about when he wakes up, and the last thing he thinks about as he's falling asleep.

John had chafed at Nancy's need for him. But he wants Rodney's, wants to be the person Rodney turns to and leans on.

"Touch yourself," Rodney says, his voice rough, and John wraps his hand around his cock without even thinking about it.

He touches himself with long, rough strokes, but he's barely feeling it. He's too focused on the heat in Rodney's eyes.

"God, John," Rodney whispers, and John lifts his other hand and rubs the head of his cock with his fingers.

Rodney moves his fingers. John had almost forgotten they were inside him. He thinks Rodney might have, too. Rodney pulls his fingers almost entirely out before sliding them back in. Fucking him, John thinks, and tightens his grip on his cock.

"Make yourself come," Rodney says, and it would be an order if Rodney didn't sound so vulnerable. "I want to see you come."

John stops teasing and focuses on the head, dragging his hand from under the ridge to the smooth skin above and then back down in a fast, steady rhythm.

Rodney touches John's prostate again, and John's flying, lifting his hips. An instant later the pleasure breaks and he's shuddering, still stroking, feeling his body tighten around Rodney's fingers as he comes.

Melting into the bed, John smiles up at Rodney. That's when he notices the hand wrapped around Rodney's cock. Rodney's fingers are still inside him. With Rodney poised to come all over him, John can't stop himself from sliding down the bed until his ass bumps one of Rodney's knees.

He can't take his eyes off Rodney's hand and Rodney's cock, flush with arousal. He wants to touch it, wants to feel how hard Rodney is, how hard John made him. But he wants to watch Rodney more.

Rodney's strokes are steady and he's rocking his hips a little, staring down at John.

Running his fingers through the come on his stomach, John lifts himself enough to press his fingers to Rodney's lips. Rodney opens and John slides his fingers inside. Rodney sucks on them, and it feels a lot like it does when Rodney sucks his cock.

Easing his fingers free, John kisses him, doing all the things he knows Rodney likes, trying to feed Rodney's arousal. Pulling away, he lays back on the bed, legs spread, pressed as close to Rodney as he can get.

"Come on me," John says.

Rodney's eyes get wider and his hand moves faster.

He comes with a groan, his fluid landing in hot stripes on John's belly, cock and balls.

Rodney's still coming when John slides his hand through Rodney's fluid, rubbing it into the skin on his stomach, his softening cock, his balls. Some of Rodney's final spurts land on the back of his hand.

Rodney stretches out on top of him, and John has to tug his hand free from where it's stuck between them.

"We have incredible sex," Rodney says, and John chuckles, wrapping his arms around Rodney's shoulders.

"Yes, yes we do."

Rodney doesn't say anything more and John's happy with that, with shared quiet and Rodney's body covering his.

Far too soon, Rodney shifts to the side, settling his head on John's shoulder. "You liked that, the whole letting me do whatever I wanted thing," Rodney says, resting his hand on John's still-sticky belly.

"Yeah," John says, because there's no point in denying it.

"Do you want to do it again?" Rodney asks.

"I'm not going to need a safe word am I?"

John feels Rodney shake his head. "I never got the whole BDSM thing," Rodney says. "The leather I get, leather can be hot. Pain, not so much. As soon as someone hit me I'd probably lose my erection."

"I don't think they punch you, Rodney," John says, amused affection making him give Rodney a squeeze.

"Yeah, well, I don't want to be flogged either."

"Darn," John says, shifting enough to kiss the top of Rodney's head. "Would you do something for me?"

"Of course." After a barely there pause Rodney adds, "What do you want me to do?"

"The dildo." It's stored in the back of Rodney's drawer. John spotted it weeks ago when he was getting out the lube, and he's been thinking about it ever since. "Would you use it for me?"

"You want to watch?" Rodney's voice goes up on the last word.

"Yeah, I do."

"Okay," Rodney says, then adds, "Can I use it on you?"

"Yes," John answers without hesitation. The idea of Rodney doing that to him would probably have him aroused all over again if he wasn't so spent. "Bet we can have a lot of fun with it."

Turning his head, Rodney brushes a kiss to a spot just above John's nipple. "I'm sure we can, especially with you on this new passive kick."

"It was just once."

"You said we can do it again."

"Which will make it twice."

"Which will make it a trend."

"Twice is not a trend." Sliding a hand along Rodney's back, John adds, "I can still order you around, you know."

"Oh, you can, can you?"

"Yup." Grinning to himself, John says, "Kiss me, Rodney. Slow. Make it last."

Lifting himself from his resting place on John's chest, Rodney leans down and brushes his lips lightly across John's, then he does it again, lingering a little longer this time. A third brush lasts still longer, and a fourth brings full contact.

Rodney's lips press into John's lower lip from both sides, teasing and tugging. Rodney pulls away, returning within a heartbeat to press his lips a little more firmly to John's. Any thoughts John had of being too spent to get aroused again are long gone as he opens himself to Rodney's interpretation of a slow kiss.

When Rodney draws back at last, it takes John a moment to gather his thoughts, which are still tangled up in the sweet pressure of Rodney's lips on his.

Rodney is smiling, looking entirely too pleased with himself. Except John kind of likes it when Rodney looks pleased with himself. "Kiss my neck," John says.

Rodney presses a quick kiss to John's Adam's apple. Then he grins.

"Not there." John lifts a hand and touches the place on his neck Rodney discovered, the one that seems to be connected directly to his dick. "Here. And do it the way you usually do. The way I like."

Rodney does.

There's nuzzling, and suction, a hint of teeth and the soft caress of Rodney's lips. John closes his eyes and tries to focus on each sensation. He really does love this, but he's never asked for it before, never told Rodney how good it feels.

He's achingly hard by the time Rodney draws back and gazes down at him, eyes wide, lips parted.

"Nipple," John says and Rodney dips his head again, lips closing around John's nipple. The suction makes him arch his back, lifting himself toward Rodney's mouth. "Squeeze the other one, just a little."

Rodney squeezes and John groans. "I didn't know you liked that," Rodney says.

Cupping Rodney's cheek in his hand, John rubs Rodney's lower lip with his thumb. "Do it again."

Rodney sucks softly, his tongue teasing the tip of John's nipple while he works the other with his fingers.

Sliding his hand into Rodney's hair, John urges him up, back to John's mouth. But Rodney stops when his lips are almost to John's. "Aren't you supposed to order me?"

"Kiss me," John says.

Rodney kisses him, deep and hungry.

It makes his head spin, telling Rodney what he wants, having Rodney give it to him. "Touch me," John says, when their kiss ends.

"Where?" Rodney whispers.

"My chest." After a second's thought, John adds, "Shoulders and arms."

"Sure," Rodney says with a grin, kneeling with one leg on either side of John's hips. Then his warm, capable hands are sliding up John's chest.

Rodney smiles as he touches. It's oddly innocent, and it warms John even more than the hands rubbing over his shoulders. Rodney's touch relaxes him even as it turns him on, and John is more than willing to simply lay there enjoying the feel of Rodney's hands on his skin until Rodney asks, "Where to now?"

He's pretty sure Rodney's expecting him to say his cock, so John smiles and says, "My legs."

"Legs," Rodney repeats, but he moves so he's kneeling between John's legs. Placing a hand on either side of John's ankle, Rodney strokes him from ankle to knee and back again. It feels good.

After a few strokes, Rodney eases his hands up past John's knee. John hadn't realized the skin on his inner thigh was so sensitive, but Rodney's fingers almost tickle. When his fingertips brush against one of John's balls, Rodney switches legs, but this time he starts at the thigh. John thinks about telling him to start at the bottom, but Rodney's hands feel so good John doesn't want to interrupt.

Rodney twirls his fingers around the knob of John's ankle. The touching feels good, but John wants more. "Suck me."

"Where?" Rodney's smile isn't so innocent this time.

"My cock. Suck my cock." John's pretty sure he's never said that before. Hell, he usually watches porn with the sound off, because phrases like 'suck my cock' have always turned him more off than on. But saying it to Rodney is kind of a turn-on, especially when Rodney wraps a hand around the base and says, "Tell me how, John. Tell me how you want it."

Groaning, John closes his eyes for a moment before lifting himself onto his elbows and looking into Rodney's eyes, dark with desire and intent. "Lick the head," John says, want roughening his voice.

Eyes locked on John's, Rodney lowers his mouth until John's cock is within reach. Then he covers the head with heavy licks from his tongue.

A fine shudder passing through him, John says, "Suck on the head."

Rodney immediately wraps his lips around John's cock, and sucks with a sensuality that makes John groan again.

And Rodney keeps sucking, not letting up and not moving. John drops his head back, lifting his hips. Rodney moves with him.

"Move, Rodney, please. Slide your mouth up and down."

Rodney slides down. Down and down and down until John feels his cock touch the back of Rodney's throat, then Rodney draws back, sucking slow and steady the whole time. He rubs his tongue over the head, and even though John hasn't told him to do it, John doesn't complain.

Rodney goes back down and John clutches at the sheets. He could come from this and he wants to. He wants to spill into Rodney's mouth, feel Rodney swallow. But he wants Rodney in him, wants Rodney to come too. "Stop."

When Rodney stops, John sits up and kisses him. "I was getting close."

"Isn't that the idea?" Rodney says.

Instead of answering, John kisses him again, putting all the crazy lust Rodney inspires in him into it, making Rodney moan softly. "Put on a condom," John says.

While Rodney reaches for the condom, John turns onto his stomach, legs parted.

John feels Rodney cup his ass in one hand for a moment before hearing the familiar sound of foil tearing. Closing his eyes, John pictures Rodney unrolling the condom along the length of his cock. He knows how thick and hard Rodney gets, knows just what it feels like to touch that cock, to slide on a condom and slick it with lube. "Put on some lube. Get yourself nice and slick."

"Okay," Rodney says, and John hears him squirting out the lube.

"Stroke your cock."

"I am. Slow and thorough, like you do it."

Fighting back a groan, John says, "Fuck me."

He feels Rodney press the head of his cock to John's entrance. "Tell me what to do. Tell me what you want."

"Push in. Open me up." John doesn't know what is turning him on more, words or actions. He just knows he wants Rodney inside him, thick and hard, strong and smart.

Rodney pushes and John gives in to the stretch, his body as eager as the rest of him.

"Go deeper. All the way," John says, and feels Rodney move into him deep and sure.

"Like this?" Rodney asks, stretching out over him, resting his weight on his hands.

"Yes," John breathes. "Slow. Fuck me slow."

"Anything," Rodney says, kissing the back of his neck. "Anything for you."

John feels him pull back slowly, and then ease back in. John finds himself breathing with the motion, as Rodney's cock glides across the nerves along his entrance and grazes his prostrate before coming to rest deep inside him.

Rodney's withdrawal is a sweet agony as the fullness is lost but the caress happens all over again.

Rodney groans when he pushes back in.

Even though John is keeping still, this feels like something they're doing together, like his body is answering Rodney's, caressing back, all on some primal level and John loses track of when they started, when they'll stop. Thinks maybe they'll never stop. Then Rodney shifts a little, sending a jolt of pleasure straight through John.

"There," John gasps, "rub there."

Rodney moves back and forth, short strokes over that place, until John feels like he's going to burst.

"Please," John says, only it's half groan.

"Please what?" Rodney answers, his breath ghosting over John's ear, making him shudder.

"Deep, go deep."

Rodney pushes in all the way, and its pure bliss, Rodney's big cock filling him. Rodney moves with hard, sure strokes, and it feels like he's somehow reaching John's cock from inside.

"I'm close," Rodney says, voice ragged.

"Come. I want..." Words desert him as Rodney wraps his arms around John's torso and rolls them both onto their sides.

Pushing back toward him, John moves his top leg forward, giving Rodney as much room as he can. Rodney's hand closes around him, and John's not in charge anymore. Not that he cares, because Rodney is in him and around him, touching him in and out. John's body is molding itself to Rodney's, answering Rodney's every shift and thrust.

It's too good to last, and John doesn't want it to stop, but he can't keep himself from moving with Rodney, rocking between his lover's hand and his lover's cock. He starts to come, but he doesn't stop. He keeps rocking, and Rodney keeps moving in him as John tightens around him again and again. Even with the condom he can feel Rodney's jerk as he comes.

They come down together, their movements slowing before subsiding altogether.

"What comes after incredible?" Rodney asks, pride in his voice.

"Don't know," John says, grabbing Rodney's hand when Rodney lets go of his cock, keeping Rodney's arm around him.

"Mmm," Rodney says.

John doesn't know what comes after incredible, but he knows they get there pretty often and he isn't sure why. He loves Rodney, that's a given, but he's loved people before and the sex wasn't anywhere near this good. More than once he's wondered if it's because Rodney is a genius at sex like he is at engineering and physics. Some of the skills are the same. Sort of, and Rodney's definitely better than any lover John's ever had at observing what John likes, remembering it and repeating it.

Snuggling back into Rodney's warmth, John says, "Why do you think it's incredible?"

"Because you trust me."

It's not the ego-indulging answer John expected. He trusts Rodney. John turns the idea over in his head. It fits. He does things with Rodney he's never done with anyone else, like tell Rodney what he wants, in embarrassing detail. "You're right."

"I know," Rodney answers, kissing his shoulder.

John pulls Rodney's arm a little more tightly around him.

Trust feels pretty damn good.